Because there is nothing we wouldn’t do for food, we toured the tri-state area in search of the perfect pizza. After doing lots of research and taste testing, we narrowed the final two contenders down to Star Tavern in Orange, New Jersey and Naples Pizza in Farmington, Connecticut.
As we sat down to eat in the Sopranos-esque setting at Star, former hostess Ellen Doernberg informed us that it was perfectly acceptable to eat at least 3 pieces of pie. As if we needed permission—social norms rarely define the quantity of our food consumption. After careful consideration, we decided to order two pies, one with olives and one with mushrooms.
*Note on vocab: Star Tavern, being the authentic second-generation Italian eatery that it is, strictly refers to its pizzas as pies. Pls abide by these rules when ordering.
True to Ellen’s word, the pizza was ah-mahzing. The waistlines of our jorts prevented us from finishing the pies during lunch, so we got the leftovers to go. Rumor has it that Alyssa finished the pizza in the backseat of the car on our way to fro yo. This has been confirmed.
Naples had more of a Gilmore Girls/Dawson’s Creek vibe than Star. In order to make an accurate epicurean comparison, Elaheh ordered a slice of pizza with olives. Not bad, but Naples simply sprinkled the olives on top of the cooked pizza, rather than cooking them into the cheese, as made at Star.
Luckily, there were plenty of house salads, eggplant fries, and kids’ portions of chicken parm to go around. The proximity of Naples to Alyssa’s alma mater, Miss Porter’s School, prohibits us from saying any negative things about the eatery. It had great food and an excellent ambience. Bias.
Since Larry Crowne failed to satiate our need for a good summer romcom, we decided to see Friends with Benefits. Friends with Benefits was eerily similar to No Strings Attached (saw this one in theaters too—brb, going to reevaluate how we live our lives), but here’s a quick comparison of the minute differences.
Male lead: Justin Timberlake is dreamy, Ashton Kutcher is dreamier. (FWB 0, NSA 1)
Female lead: Natalie Portman is the ultimate girl crush so not much of a contest here. Mila Kunis is a babe but as Andy Samberg’s character says in the first scene, her eyes are kind of “buggy.” (FWB 0, NSA 2)
Characters’ professions: JT played the Art Director of GQ while Ashton Kutcher was an aspiring director for a Glee-like show. Mila Kunis played a slick headhunter, but Natalie Portman made the audience believe that the life of a medical student in her first year of residency was glamorous. As we like to say, either you’re a doctor or you’re not. (FWB 0, NSA 3)
Soundtrack: Death Cab for Cutie’s “I Will Follow You Into the Dark” had recurring clips in FWB, but a notable scene in NSA has Natalie Portman singing along to Leona Lewis’ “Bleeding Love.” Only way to decide the winner of this one is to refer to our iTunes playcount. Elaheh: Bleeding Love-78, DCFC-8. Alyssa: Bleeding Love-1, DCFC-54. This is awkward. Pity point for FWB. (FWB 1, NSA 3)
Daily Picks, woof.
- Movie: In honor of the recurring dreams Elaheh has been having of Freddie Prinze Jr, we elect Summer Catch.
- Book: Reservation Blues by Sherman Alexie. Thomas-Builds-the Fire: saaach a deep character analysis. Did you know that Native Americans invented fried dough?
- Song: Any melancholy ballads by Coldplay, namely Fix You and the Scientist.
- TV Show: Look for reruns of Sunday’s episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians to see Kim confront Kris about genetically passing down psoriasis. Could’ve been worse though…when Kris had her first episode of psoriasis in the 70s, she thought it was leprosy.
- Sale of the week: Nordstrom Anniversary Sale! We stopped by the Westfarm’s mall this week to check out the awesome deals, notably a dress marked down from $287 to $285. Shoutout to Nordstrom’s salespeople who rely solely on commission, especially this salesperson in the accessories department sporting fall’s trendiest headwear: